thouGht pRocEss

Ever wonder how that works? ...i cant stop.

throughout this non-stop internal babble you have to at some point come to realize whether or not you think that you actually think the same way that normal people do... do you? i mean do you think you do?

i think i don't...I'm not very excited about the idea of having a different thought process, but i cant deny the facts...

i often find myself pondering...not as though half way through i realize i should get back to work...more like i catch myself in the act and then i have no idea what i was pondering over at all! its like my braim is made up of an entire household, each having their own opinions and ideas and they are constantly discussing things...all kinds of arbitrary things, but i don't usually know what they are saying because their voices are just out of earshot...instead there is a big, disembodied voice to tell me what the household is going on about...

there is however, a slight problem with this voice...it doesn't always pay attention to the household, and isn't always honest... yes that's right, my own brain, lying to me!

how deceitful!

So in the case where I'm strolling along in woollies, pondering ( you can even see the blank look on my face-like the lights are on but there's nobody home...) and then i suddenly stop, mid-isle, because i have once again caught myself in the act (of pondering) and by this point i would be questioning the Voice furiously, trying to find the point of all this wasted thought...

You: "What is going on in there? What are they(the household of thought) saying?!

Voice: "Umm...Nothing..."

You: "Nothing? So- what?- They are quiet?

Voice: "Well, err...they are meditating...."

If at any stage the household of thought lapses into silence, it is time to start panicking for your life, because when there's nobody to decide which thoughts get discussed and which are tossed into the darkest corner of the closet... that is when the Voice takes over, and let it be known that the Voice is evil! no matter who's voice it is, once that thing takes control of your thoughts, you are clinically insane...

it is especially embarrassing when somebody actually asks you what your thinking about while you and the Voice are arguing over what the household where actually discussing...




Girl(external): "hey, what re you thinking?"

Guy(external): "umm...nothing..."

Guy's voice(internal): "i TOLD you so!"

Guy(internal): "Lier!"

Guy's Voice(internal): "Hypocrite!"

Girl's Voice(internal): "The household agrees that this guy is weird, and that you should move further away from him. Perhaps use the next till..."



There is of course the option of skipping straight past the Voice and having nobody in your head at all...but in order for that to be anywhere near successful you have to shoot that damned Voice!